First things first. If you’re looking for a cutesy little tutorial with beautiful stage lighting, a beautiful backdrop, or teeny boppers with orangutan lips you might move along now. You won’t find any of that here. I’m real, and I’m raw. I love me some Jesus but I cuss a little too. The point of this post is to show other moms or 30 somethings (or older), how I do my face. I’m doing this because I polled on Insta and y’all responded (probably all 2 of you, but still).
Apparently y’all like seeing my mug!
Just a couple of disclaimers.
I haven’t had any work done on my face. No fillers, No Botox. Scars, fine lines, wrinkles, spots and all, you’re going to see them. Be prepared. I do have eyelash extensions though, and I do get my eyebrows tinted and waxed. It saves me time and honey, at this age time is priceless.
I am in no way, shape, or form a professional and I will not pretend to be. Unless of course you want to sponsor me. Until then, I have some splurge products and some drug store products…like any cheap ass mom on a budget.
All my makeup questions are answered by my teen. She is brilliant, beautiful, and talented with makeup, but she doesn’t want to be featured. Insert sad emoji.
There’s a video at the end of this article to show you everything I discuss.
Now that that’s out of the way, let’s get to work.
I’m a lazy girl when it comes to skin care. These are my go to makeup removing wipes.
For when I’m a dirty girl.
Daily moisturizer is so very important in our thirties! Here is my go to moisturizer.
Anti aging products? I’ve tried many and lost lots of money in the process. Here’s what I currently use and I’m really happy with it!
Save at Walgreens!
Found on Clearance at Target
Now that we’re clean and moisturized we can begin to apply. But first let’s talk brushes. Have you seen the mounds of makeup brush displays at stores lately? And the prices!!!! Yikes. What I’ve learned thus far is that for foundation you want a beauty blender sponge, and you need to get it barely damp to apply (unless it specifies dry). I get mine damp and squeeze excess water with a dry towel. The rest of my brushes I’ve collected over the years or I’ve gotten as sets on sale….again, I’m kind of a cheap ass.
Let’s get started. This is the Stila foundation I use. Honestly, it was on sale and had a good color selector. When I get rich, I’ll try Tarte shape tape foundation, but until then, this works. Best part is under that flippy lid is the concealer! I use this concealer in addition to the contour concealer when my eczema is flaring up. Fork you endometriosis induced menopause…..ugh…
It’s skincare. Must splurge.
Next is the fun part, the contouring. I’ve only used contouring for a few months now but I must say I really like how it shapes the face! I contour just under the cheekbones, the sides of the nose, and the forehead. I prefer not to do my jaw line because I’m paranoid about the orange line look, and it’s a pretty damn strong jawline anyway. I have a stick because it’s easy, and I blend with a beauty blender.
To highlight I dab the forehead, bridge of the nose, under eyes and upper cheeks, and the upper lip and chin. Basically, wherever light hits is where you highlight, and wherever the shadows fall is where you contour. After contouring I use a finishing powder to blend. This NYX photo finish powder works just fine!
Onto brows. Brows are hot right now. Why? Because the economy has found a way to make them profitable that’s why!!!! Anyway, I get mine tinted and waxed (at a Benefit Brow Bar at the store Ulta) to save me time, and because I got a gnarly scar from a failed eyebrow piercing at 18 years old. What you want to do with the brow is line, fill, and use a angle brush with foundation underneath when you’re done. Girls. This is what I use:
Save or splurge, It’s up to you!
Splurge on a good brow pencil.
Next up is eyes. I used to use liner and mascara. Now that I got these extensions, I only use mascara on the lower only. Saves that precious time, like I said! Ladies, trust me when I say splurge on good, quality eye shadow! The good stuff will last you twice as long, and it takes less product to apply. The color pigment will be better, and it will blend better. I follow the basic three color zone concept. There are a million ways to do eye shadow, I keep it simple with the natural look. Finish with under brow highlight. Top it off with mascara and those peepers are done.
Now for the big face finish. Face highlight! I like to do this last for two reasons. 1) I want it to last as long as possible and 2) I feel like a forking unicorn when it’s done. Splurge on good highlight! The drug store highlight is not worth it! I’ve wasted a lot of dough on it and it’s left me looking more like a alley cat than the magical unicorn I want to be.
Wrap it up with lips. My least favorite part of my face. 90% of the time I only use the Bees. Burt’s Bees that is. This chap stick will literally change your life. I found these little Tarte lipsticks on a holiday special. Otherwise, I’m not really a lipstick gal at all. The Maybeline liner I found after a lady tried to sell me a $27 liner…do I look like I have that kinda money? Cause I don’t.
Voila. Your face should be fabulous. Let’s admit it, we’re fabulous with or without makeup. But for me, I feel like I might just have my shit together when I have my face on.
Here’s a slower video for you too…
In the meantime, stay sober my friends. It looks good on you!